As a mom I have days that I feel I have accomplished everything as supermom and nothing can get me down. Then there are days that I feel I have failed at the mission God has given me – my children. Recently it has been the latter in a particular area. I have noticed with my boys that they are not using their beautiful mind God has given them as much as they should. Here is a scenario that will help you to see why I would think this way.
Brandon is 11 almost 12. He wears glasses and we had to buy him a new pair. We were on visitation one night, when I noticed he didn’t have them on. When I asked him, he said he had put them somewhere safe so he could throw the football. Why I thought that was a good answer I’m not sure! When we got home, he got out of the van and proceeded to look at the front outside of the van. Then turned to me and said did you take my glasses?!
I wasn’t sure if I was more upset that he had lost the glasses; or the fact leaving them on the car while driving was a safe place!!!!!
That is just one of the many things that have taken place. Forgetting to turn water off, throwing a fry across the table to hit your brother but hitting a lady, wearing 2 different shoes because you didn’t want to look for the other one, seeing who could look over the balcony the farthest, putting clean clothes in the dirty hamper and dirty ones in the clean… The list could go on and on!! I know what some of you are thinking – they are boys! These are things that eventually and hopefully they will learn not to do as they get older (I pray daily).
It’s the constantly need to call for me, and need me to figure things out for them that concerns me. As a mom I need to teach them and to train them the way God intended me to. The problem is a lot of times I micro manage them. I can’t be Supermom and come to the rescue every time. I need to let them be their own Heros sometimes. Even in the arguing, I am too quick to jump in and play referee, but the truth is they won’t have mommy there to get them out of situations. I can use the excuse I’m training them or they are still little. In reality, I am not supposed to be teaching them for that instant and moment in time. I am supposed to be training them for life. I am realizing more than ever they need to learn some independence, and how to work things out on their own.
Jesus was an example to me in the way He led His disciples. He trained them and taught them. Then He left them on their own to do what He had trained them to do. Many times they failed, but through their mistakes they became stronger and learned from them.
My boys need to learn to work different situations out on their own. When they can’t do something a certain way or the first time, I can’t let them give up, but encourage them to try it a different way. I can’t come running to the rescue every time they have a problem (except emergencies – I think that is a given! ) When the butter doesn’t go on as smooth, I can’t reach for it and say I’ll do it. When they bring me a math problem they can’t solve, I need to say – try a couple more minutes. When they are arguing over who gets to pick a game or ride a certain bike, I need to listen and let them figure it out. It’s tough to watch them struggle, especially when it would be nothing for me to help. It’s even more rewarding to see their face light up and be so proud of themselves doing it on their own. I am still teaching them, but allowing them to use the training I have taught them. All the while under my protection.
The same way God does with me. He has taught me in His Word how to live, yet I still make mistakes. God doesn’t save me all the time from those mistakes, but wants me to use the training and teachings He has given me to “figure” it out. All the while under His protection.